"Deviant Decadence"

‎"Deviant Decadence"


I've asked myself a thousand times:
"Do I really want to do this?"
I have the script. I've studied the lines;
But I act as if I never knew this.
Those are familiar lips.
They will offer no new kiss
And I recognize those hips.
Leftover lust. Not a new dish.
I'm still unsure if I should do this:
Search old seas for new fish,
Act like throwback is new bliss
As if she holds my true wish.
I won't lie.
Some things I do miss;
She was my tomb.
I was Anubis.
I was locked within her womb.
She held me deep inside.
She knows I'd never leave soon.
I just take root and confide.
Time was never really an issue.
We always found a way to bide
As we conjoined flesh and tissue
As if to strap up for a ride.


I sit back and reminisce,
Relax, wax and repeat
And have yet to notice
That I'm in her passenger seat.
I turn to look at her;
But she is focused on the highway.
She tells me that it's my choice.
We can do everything my way.
What more could I say?
I can't believe I just said that.
I've clearly lost my way.
I don't know where my head's at.
I guess it's time to knuckle up.
I just buckle up and fall back.
My girl just hit me up.
It goes to voice mail. I'll call back.
Not right now, though.
Hell, she might be asleep later.
My conscience tells me not to go;
But I can't seem to play evader.
She winks at me. I blink back.
This makes no sense! I used to hate her!
My girl is what she severely lacks;
So why should I accommodate her?
Why was it so easy to bait her?
Why couldn't I just dismiss
Someone who always was the fader;
Stealing sunlight & keeping me pissed?


I've no clue of what to think next.
I didn't plan any of this.
That's when my girl sent me a text:
A smiley face, a heart and a kiss;
But before I could reply,
Overhead lights blinded my eyes.
My phone dropped; and to my surprise,
I felt her hands on my thighs.
Before any words were said,
She turned the key. Lights were dead.
Gathered knees. Lowered head.
By 1:43, she was full and fed.
What's wrong with me?
That's what I should've said.
I should have stopped; but instead,
Here I am at the foot of her bed.


The doors are locked.
The entire house is sealed off.
I'm erect. Solid as a rock.
She asks me to help her peel off.
Clothes cascade to the floor;
Revealing dark chocolate skin.
Perspiration seeps through my pores
And the air is getting thin.
She gyrates a little more
As she invites me to dig in.
I hesitate; but I don't negate.
Her leg is up; so I give in.
At first, I feel a little nauseous.
Don't get me wrong. She's worth a savor.
I'm just apprehensive and cautious
As if I'm doing intensive labor;
But as time gets more extensive,
There is an influx in behavior.
Another lick, a few more sucks
And I willingly grant her favor.


Yeah I know. I'm in some muck.
I chose to wade deep in the mire.
This will surely deplete my luck;
But I just can't fight desire.
It's obvious that I know better;
But I let her catch my ire.
I did my part to make her wetter.
Now I can't put out her fire.


She climbs on top of me,
Makes me her property
And I give her the business.
She wants it all. She's my monopoly.
Deep down, it truly bothers me.
I should've initially turned back;
But she's laying on her back.
I should resist; but I attack.
She says I'm what she missed;
Says I'm what the others lacked.
She leans in for a deep kiss;
But still won't cut me any slack.
She becomes vulgar and blunt;
Wants to see what I've got packed,
Bends over and faces the front
And gently arches her back.


Why am I still here?
Was it not crystal clear
That I am simply destroying
A true love that I hold dear?
She's calling for me:
"You're not done. Come here."
It shakes and bounces enticingly;
So I relinquish those fears.
I mount her and she takes me in.
She looks back with an evil grin
As if to signify her win
By helping me take part in this sin.
I look back at her
And my stomach is in lumps;
But I disregard and violently pump
Until knees buckle and I dump.


The air gets colder.
She's knocked out; still slumped over.
I feel drunk although I'm sober.
I guess this means I'm sleeping over.
I throw my shirt over my shoulders.
When she awakes, I'm going home.
She turns sideways and moves over.
I start searching for my phone.
I know it can't be far.
Damn! I left it in the car!
The battery is dead;
So I look for it under the stars.


I still haven't found it yet.
That's when it flashes my missed texts:
"Baby? Are you home yet?"
"Did you forget?"
"Still bringing me to work?"
"Is your alarm set?"
"Are you ok? Are you hurt?"
"Please call back. I'm trying not to fret."


I sit there with my head down.
I look at her photo and start to frown.
I was dumb enough to let one night
Tear everything that we built down.
I turned away from the better me
And sought refuge from the light
So I could delight in deviant decadence:
A cold dish of infidelity and plight. 


So much for a good night...


Written by: Devin Joseph Metz

"The Pursuit (The Perfect Fruit)"

"The Pursuit (The Perfect Fruit)"


Most of the girls that approach me
I barely know from Adam 
And I've the kind of expectations
That I'm afraid they can't fathom.
They say that they're unique;
Favoring a beauty greater than Eve;
But the fruit that their tree bares
Leaves little reason to believe.


I remember this watermelon.
Told me she tasted like heaven;
But she was nothing like manna.
She was barely even bread unleavened.
Initial sweetness hid bitter kisses.
She swore that she was seedless;
But after years of spitting,
I decided I didn't need this.


I thought love was out of reach.
That's when I met this southern peach.
She had a soft exterior
And a sticky sweet tone in her speech.
She was sure that she made it
Because peaches are my favorite.
She could've kept my mind close;
But her ambition was to enslave it.
Her ego bruises easy;
So I just ate around the pit
Until she tried to make me queasy.
That's when the gorging had to quit.


That experience took it's toll;
But I finally broke those shackles.
Then one day; during a stroll,
I ran into this pineapple.
She wore her mask well.
Always had so much to tell.
She tried her best to hide
That she was just a hard shell.
Her stories were frequent. 
Dare I say chronic.
She lied so much that she believed it;
But I knew she was far from exotic.
She didn't offer much substance.
Her deeper innards were almost bare.
It was hell peeling that outer shell
Only to find little fruit there.
She assumed that I was vain.
She was sure I was unaware
that what clings to her veins
Was more than she could share.


Maybe this just wasn't my lane.
The weight of love was far too heavy;
So I hopped on a plane
Only to converse with a cherry.
Everything seemed legit.
She might be my perfect fit.
She even disclosed the fact
That she came with a pit.
She complimented my charm.
I acknowledged her wit.
We did the kind of things
That fruit fanciers could never forget.
She said I'm her " Favorite Him."
I catered to her deviant whim.
Her moans resonated like a hymn
Every time my tongue tied her stem.
I was sure I had it made;
But the thrill was sure to fade.
She flung pits at my eyes
And her stems cut me like blades.
Then came the day her juice dripped
Only to land on another's lips.
I caught them in mid sip;
But she shrugged and continued to dip.
So relentless in her cheating.
She gave my heart a beating.
Part of me wanted to keep eating;
But I was better off just leaving.


After that, love was just too scary.
I found myself being wary
Of any and every potential mate;
No matter how much they varied.


Strawberries were so stuck up.
Blueberries always wanted pity.
Blackberries were boisterous and dominant.
Raspberries thought they ran the city.


Lemons made me pucker up.
Limes were far too sour.
Cantaloupes weren't really lively
And pomegranates want all the power.


I remember years ago
When I would hang with my crew.
They would chase the plums around;
But I liked this honeydew.
She didn't care for grape bunches.
She didn't need mass appeal.
She didn't come off like the oranges.
She wasn't that easy to peel.
She was uniformed and neat.
She was just so real;
But I was too shy to greet.
I may never know how she feels.


I guess this isn't for me.
It may be too much to grapple.
At least that's how it used to be....
..................Before I met my apple.


That's my baby.
My one true lady.
When the wiles of life encased me,
She was more than ready to save me.


So ripe.
So crisp.
Every bite felt right.
I still taste her when I lick my lips.


Other guys chase those mangoes
And pull at the papayas
But my girl is juicy enough
To handle my detailed desire.


She displays impeccable skill
When removing my banana peel.
She let's me bore through her core.
Our bond is serene and surreal.


She's delicate when warm
And so subtle when chilled.
She never causes me harm.
She always keeps my heart filled.


She's everything and more than.
She's all I would ever need.
We've recently started our garden.
She helped me sow my seeds.


She lifts our branches higher
While I firmly forge our roots.
Our children will come to admire
Our nurturing bond of love and truth.


Love has finally shown some mercy.
It was truly a worthy pursuit.
My heart no longer wanders thirsty.
I have found the perfect fruit. ♥


Written by: Devin Joseph Metz

"Ascension: My Ambition"

"Ascension: My Ambition"


I ascend this flight of stairs
in hopes of what may come after;
but I occasionally stumble;
tumbling to the sound of laughter.
They say "A wise man would stay down.
Sit on the steps. Just lay down.
What you search for won't be found.
A lowly pauper can't chase the crown."


I truly detest such statements.
They aren't aware of my intent;
but seek to determine my social placement.
I guess their mentality is of brief extent.
If you've never removed your mask,
don't offer your point of view;
and unless I've outlined my tasks,
don't concern yourself with what I do.


Herein lies a man
with no backup plan,
no contingency clause,
and no controller to pause.


Standing here is a man
completely capable of flaw.
Some of which can't be absolved
because he remembers all that he saw.


In front of you is a man
still learning how life works.
The values aren't always great;
but he knows what life is worth.
His ambition towards his work
corresponds to how much he cares.
He has no lapse in confidence
and he is always self aware.
He can recognize his limits;
but he knows better than to set them.
He's willing to view the distorted image.
That may be why he never forgets them.


This is me.
That's all there is to see.
I'm not a legend or enigma.
Not a God or deity.
I'm just a man in training;
learning as I move along.
Time keeps moving and churning.
I just pace myself and stay strong.


I've no storybook life.
I just claim what I'm given.
I'm that big headed boy
raised by a family of women.
"Daddy wasn't there;"
but that's of little importance.
My Grandmother imparted the utmost care
and made sure that all took notice.
My Mother means the world to me.
She is my closest friend.
She helped me push when I couldn't see
and taught me how to reach till the end.
If ever there were polar opposites,
it would be my sister and brother.
Their arguments are relentless;
but I know they love each other.
My cousin was there for me
every time my heart was shattered.
Although it sometimes annoys me,
I understand why he delves in my matters.
I shared this heart with three
before the age of 24.
Maybe the third wasn't a charm;
but I have faith in number four.
Literature is my passion.
It's my first and true love.
It never pushes me away.
It would rather soothe than shove.


There isn't much left to say;
at least not much that deserves retention.
I'll climb these stairs every day
because there's purpose in my ascension. 


Written By: Devin Joseph Metz

"(Rebel) {Radical} [Renegade]"

"(Rebel) {Radical} [Renegade]"


What lies under this hood
is a rebel.


That's what they call me, at least.
They call me "borderline ghastly,"
they say I'm nasty,
and claim that I do deals with the devil.
They say I'm sporadic.
They swear that I'm frantic;
but I hardly ever act out;
so I don't know why they see panic.


Maybe I am a little manic.
I'm sure to be unstable.
I'm the one that's labeled
for laying in his grave
instead of his cradle.
I misconstrue short stories
and lay ridicule to fables.
Lay me on this table
and cut me open 
if you don't think I'm able.


Tell me what you see.
Look deep inside of me
and unleash that mad man
that you always said I would be.


What lies beneath this cloak
is a radical.


I'm an avid extremist.
I'm far from placid.
My mind pushes past it's apex;
so my thoughts are never flaccid.
Average thoughts are soft serve.
Mine resemble dripping acid:
It bores through and eats away
at all who aren't willing to pass it.
Peculiar things catch my ire
when I sit here at my spire
like how flaming ice
can feel like frozen fire.


I have unorthodox daydreams.
I never question what they mean.
It would appear, or so it seems
that I recall what I haven't seen.
It makes no sense.
It holds no scheme;
but it keeps me going.
It's the post on which I lean.


Maybe I'm off my rocker.
I may appear a little improper;
but I heard insanity was free;
so I stuffed my mental locker.
Does that come as a shocker
or is it clever and bold
for me to be an open book
full of stories that may never be told?


What rests within this shroud
is a renegade.


Conductive class.
Sinister grade
of a destructive past:
Militant made.
Try to palate the contents of my glass.
Go ahead. Drink the lemonade.
Consume my elixir whole
and you'll see how quickly feelings fade.


I'm bright enough to blind;
but I bask in a darker shade.
I left the world behind;
wearing the mask that my shadows made.
I wrap myself within these garbs
that have now become standard issue.
The wiles of friendship are vile.
Don't expect me to say "I miss you."
I turned away from love that day.
I've lost the desire to kiss you.
Just stay at bay. Don't come my way
or I will surely dismiss you.


Deep inside
lies the underline:
Terms that can't be defined.
I am the new design.
You'll never see into my eyes.
We can stand face to face;
but your deducing won't recover
what has already been displaced.


I really don't care if I'm unleveled.
I only seek my sabbatical
in route to where I've often laid;


so label me a rebel.


Call me a radical.


View me as a renegade.


Written By: Devin Joseph Metz

"If I Had My Way"

"If I Had My Way"


If I had my way....


Your only memory of yesterday
would be the loving words we say
that quell the fire of "back when;"
gently rinsing it all away.


If I had my way....


Our profound, perfectly explicit wishes
would be smeared against walls
like mist against shower stalls.
Moans would travel down halls.
Unsuspecting ears would hear your calls:
"Baby, stand tall.
Hold me up. Don't let me fall.
Fill me up. Let my thoughts crawl."


If I had my way....


What we strive for
and would surely die for
would be all that we'd have in store.
I would close unnecessary doors
so that I could give you more.
We would lay at the ocean floor;
drowning in our private aspirations
and then I'd invite you to shore.


If I had my way....


I would cater to your wonder.
I would eviscerate your plight
and eradicate your blunder.
I would be your nightmare hunter.
You would treat your past tense
like most treat their common sense:
Cast them among the realm of the forgotten.
They're just links on an old, rusty fence.


If I had my way....


Distance would feel like an option
and not like a death sentence.
Our tattered hearts wouldn't need adoption
and our flaws wouldn't need repentance.


If I had my way....


Every day would impart a new epiphany:
Featuring thoughts of you,
Thoughts of me,
Thoughts of we.
Our foundation would be serenity.
Our walls would be lined with tranquility.
We would be sheltered by divinity;
Basking in this eclectic trinity.


Yes.


If I had my way....


I would stay another night.
I would delay my flight.


If I had my way....


I would stay seven extra days
after the extent of forever,
and the duration of eternity.
You would always be with me. <3


Written By: Devin Joseph Metz

"Feel Me: Four Dimensions"

"Feel Me: Four Dimensions"


I want you to feel me.


You don't have to subscribe.
You just have to understand.
Don't act out solely on pride;
always so quick to reprimand.
Learn the route before you drive.
Adhere to purpose and plans;
because a concentrated ride
keeps a destination at hand.
Forget what they say.
Put the rumors to bed.
Gossip is a malignant tumor;
claiming host to your head.
Learn to filter what is said.
Carefully process what you're fed;
because words are quite fragile
like candlelight to the thread.
Walk the roads seldom traveled.
Watch the land that you tread.
The enlightened path may be narrow;
but why choose darkness instead?


I need you to feel me.


This is the real me.
I know that I've lied
no matter how hard you've tried
and now our love won't survive.
It's not an issue of pride.
I just couldn't decide.
I see the tears in your eyes;
but I just can't let it die.
I honestly can't explain why
I never could say goodbye.
I hear your pain in each sigh.
I hate that I make you cry;
But I can't seem to abstain.
I just won't let it subside
so I bring her up again
although it hurts you inside.
It truly drives me insane
to watch you take this in stride.
You say there's something to gain.
I just want a place to hide.


Baby...come here...feel me.


You look so down and depressed.
Close the book. Come to bed.
You're so flustered and stressed.
Let me study you instead.
I know that some of life's tests
invoke the tears that you shed;
so I just want you to relax.
Just lay back. Rest your head.
I must say that I confess
that I've been ever so obsessed:
Waiting in angst for this body
that I've been longing to caress.
I'm sure that you'll appreciate
once I start to alleviate;
allowing you to deviate
so I can begin to liberate.
Let sharp breaths levitate
as words break and come late.
I want your mind state
to match your heart rate:
Fluttering. Sputtering.
Not obtuse. Just loose. My free soul:
struggling and stuttering;
sporadically spiraling out of control.
Forget rules and roles.
Do away with standard issue.
I get closer to my goal
with every single place that I kiss you.
Look me square in the eyes
whilst you generously gyrate.
Feel the friction in your thighs
as you slowly start to vibrate.
You'll relinquish every thought
that sought to claim retention;
removing yourself from what is wrought
while slowly releasing all tension
and when the air gets thin
as it gets difficult to breathe,
I'll reach your soul from deep within
until I know that you're relieved.
I take pride in being your reprieve.
I'm always eager to please you.
I know that you must leave;
but come back soon. I need you.


You say you do; but you don't feel me.


I know that you're aware;
but I want to know you care.
Your words lack validation.
I need you to be there...
...at least I used to...
...Your son outgrew you.
It was hard when I was younger;
But now, it's like I never knew you.
I barely see you
and rarely need to;
so I've gotten to the point
where I surely don't need you.
Suffice it to say,
it should probably stay this way.
We've had our moments and days;'
but far too often, you've been at bay.
Distance forced me to break away.
Time taught me how to detach.
You never quit. You loved to play
and now our leaks can't be patched.
I think back to when I wanted you:
My cousins had a father, too.
Uncle treated me the same;
but I couldn't hide the pain.
Imagine how bad my heart hurts;
but it won't reach the rest of me.
You weren't there to see my worst;
so you don't deserve the best of me.


Don't display your skills to me.
God knows what you will be.


These bouts of secrecy
will surely kill what's left of we.


Life tries it's best to make you dull;
but trust me, baby: You thrill me.


Even when forced to stand still,
I'm further than your will can see.


I just want you to feel me.


Do you feel me?


Written by: Devin Joseph Metz