Wednesday, November 8, 2017

"To Misplace"

"To Misplace"

Sorry for falling asleep
on the phone last night.
I've been weeks
without nights
and saw the perfect opportunity
to pretend your words
were news to me
when they aren't even new
to me.
I'm sure that came out wrong...
...I think aloud frequently
so I apologize for that.
I apologize for even having to
and have felt contrite for having you
for longer than anticipated.
I know that sounds so antiquated
much like what I'll say eventually
but from when you first befriended
me,
I thought it best to be
proactive when removing infinity
from that exquisite position on the table.
Forever
spoke in fables
is the most sought after
simplistic
form of unrealistic
and I get physically sick
from trying to mix it
with every day shit
so while I'm still somewhat able
and because my heart says so,
you should know
that
We let it run deep.....
.....you weren't my all....
.....but you were my only one.
I'm afraid to fall asleep.
The fear is in that fall
so I reach for my only one....
..........but like I said,
that's my head
and why I keep it covered
below clouds that like to hover
making my somber thoughts obvious
like the one where
I speak with loneliness
and she asks me
to remedy
singularity
but I always say
"There's only us."


It's hidden in the way
those words hang
and drip
from your lips
that cause me to stumble
much like tripping down stairs
while drunk...
...my heart sunk
I'm sinking deeper into
the way
those simple words cut.
Let's keep it real.
Blunt.
Stunted emotions
can only grow within
hearts when given proper care.
Not to be unfair
but do you really care?
I know you've heard that before
so before we make this a chore
we'll both regret...
...let's just take two steps...
back.
I'd never retract my feelings
but until infinity
seems a little never ending story
to me
Like childhood fairytales
with afters that are happily
invested in selling endings.
Sappy romance isn't my thing...
...I tell myself and pretend
not to notice your reaction
to the credits at the
end
of our allegory.
But you should know
before you go
that
I've fallen in deep...
....you weren't my all...
....but you were my chosen one.
I'm scared to turn off the lights.
My fear lies in the dark
so I look for my chosen one...
....so remember when I say,
you're welcome to stay
until the break of day
beyond twilight's last bit of grey
when our logic is exhausted
our hearts are no longer cautious
and I ask you
to remedy
singularity
just tell me
"There's only us."


We weren't shaped for this world.
Even if the feeling
that of resting
flat
flushed
against the side wall
that feels like the ceiling
when we wake up
isn't enough to take up
the recurrent discomfort
consistently imbued
that playfully jumps
from me
to you
and back again.
Back from when that
title
offered some sense of revival...
...some scent of survival...
...something once so vital
I now couldn't bare to say.
Told that I should pray
before I think
before I act
but I tire of the tact.
Looking for a pass
just to dance on glass
nervously.
Purposely,
I have extended my limits
and cannot reach beyond fatigue
so the good fight
is now the seed crushed
and slid across concrete
so before the raised feet
makes display of the incomplete,
just remember
at your peak
that
we
should've never run deep...
....you weren't my all
but you were my only one.
Let the past sleep.
Let it all fall.
This
was the only one....


We weren't made for promises.
But remember when
you promised
me prominence?
Now we stare into the distance
while our hearts
feign feelings quite the opposite.
Have we become
fake...
...counterfeit
crumpled like the sheets on the floor.
Will we both come back...
...stripped
searching for more.
Promising to ignore what
sits idle
feeding into our deprival...
...waiting for the sun's arrival...
...this goodbye will be our final.
Did I dream the idea of you?
Did lust obscure my view
before I choose
before I exit
let's spend it wisely.
Promising that the imagery
of this room will become memory
fondly.
Internally,
I have rescinded my invite
and will not exceed capacity
my struggle ends here
and the key cannot be retrieved
make no mistakes
before you take your leave
at our peak
that
we
will always run deep...
...you weren't my all
but you were my chosen one.
Let's go back to sleep.
Let's continue to dream.
This
will never be the only one.




 




















Written By: Kiana Fitzpatrick and Devin Joseph Metz